Interconnection

I think one of the greatest gifts of doing this blog has been the sense of connection is had provided. And, as may have happened with others who blog too, I don't think I realized how isolated I was feeling or what an impact that connection would have on me until it was there.

Social interest and social connection are a big thing with Adler, who is one of my favorite theorists. It goes along with the ideas espoused by Bronfenbrenner, Buddhism, the Unitarian Universalists, and other systems/social thinkers or movements... the idea being: connection to, interaction with, and mindfulness of others in our various contexts provides a sense of meaning, purpose, and joy.

Sometimes I think a lot of what ails us individually and as a society/culture/world population is too strong a sense of social isolation and assumed necessity for independence (rathern than interdependence). Mind you, more collectivistic cultures may not struggle with this internally - but often there is still an interior focus that prevents or shies away from embracing a sense of responsibility to, similarity with, or appreciation for other cultures.

So... as I again remind myself of what has been a lifelong lesson to reach out more and find ways to authentically bond with the people around me, I offer the same invitation to you. It's so hard sometimes to let other people in, particularly strangers or those who feel foreign or different or other from us. But the more we strive to incorporate the experience and worldviews of everyone around us into our lives, the greater our capacity for compassion, growth, peace, and joyfulness.

Huh.

I wonder sometimes if most nearly anything we would label as a negative reaction or emotion or response (e.g., anger, violence, depression, fear, withdrawal, etc.) is essentially connected to an unending sense/search for love and acceptance.

Is it possible "ugly" behavior is ultimately rooted in a perceived lack of acceptance? If one were to seek the primary emotion below the secondary reactions rooted in defensiveness or offensiveness (i.e., the feeling one must take the offensive in order to avoid being hurt, damaged, etc.), would it somehow exist as a foundational need that is simultaneously emotional and spiritual... something that transcends physical or intellectual yearnings. Something basic, primal, but ultimately human... a search for connection, for belonging, for meaning.

I believe the struggle to feel valued, above all, may inherently be present for all of us. This may segue into attachment theory and the Adlerian concept of social interest. But I also think there is something deeply embedded within the source of our living - be it a soul, or a spark, or a breath.

For who does not wish to be seen? And upon being seen to be understood... and upon being understood to be welcomed? If we all believed, without question, we held value and worth, as did everyone around us... how might that change our interactions?

Perhaps compassion is the act of embracing such a belief and holding onto it with unshakable faith.

To do a thesis or not to do a thesis (a drop in the bucket, let's say)...

So... one of the many things I've gone back and forth on within my current graduate training has been whether or not to do a thesis. (I also go back on forth on whether the program/major/career path is right for me, whether to do a dual specialization in school and community counseling, whether to do an additional year or try to finish as quickly as possible, and whether to go on for a Ph.D. or Psy.D. so that I can teach.)

Lately I've been grabbed by the idea of continuing my exploration of and interest in creative and expressive arts interventions and looking at existing research on utilizing such techniques with multicultural populations for whom strictly verbal approaches (i.e., talk therapy) are not adequately effective.

The latest Journal of Creativity in Mental Health has a few articles right up this alley, which got me thinking about it again today, after having sort of written it off as "too much work" and "not really what I want or where I'm headed."

But then, that's only true in certain moments... because I tend to vacillate greatly as I flounder through life in search of what I am passionate about and what I want. Seems so silly that should be such a hard thing for me to define, but it is.

Only time will tell whether I embark upon a lit review and case study example on integrating creative and expressive arts into school counseling techniques and interventions. As an appreciator of Adler, finding some way to utilize such approaches within a small group context would probably be ideal, especially since it connects with some of my other research/personal interests with regard to the intersection of self-esteem and social connection.

Who knows. Maybe something will happen to make it all clear. Or maybe I will simply find a moment within which to choose one path or the other... and commit to such a road, despite my misgivings it may be the wrong one. (Of course, the ultimate shift to embrace is believing there is no wrong road. But I'm still working on that one.)

The bottom line, though, is that it's a joy to have such a struggle in the first place. I feel blessed to be in school, to have the ability to do such work, and to have the support of my advisers to push myself in this way. Whether I choose to do one or not, it's a great dilemma to have... especially if I look at the bucket and not the drops.

2012 and beyond...

Today held an alarming number of stories about natural disasters across the United States and in other countries. Wildfires in Florida, a sinkhole in Washington, D.C., tornadoes in Missouri and Oklahoma, an earthquake in China, volcano activity, and - of course - the cyclone in Myanmar.

I'm not sure where you sit on the whole greenhouse/2012/sea level rise thing. Andy and I tend to be a little worried about it and spend a lot of time debating whether or not we wish to make safety from natural disasters, potential pole shifts, and/or a crash in the economy a priority when plotting our next steps.

Although I don't fully buy into the prophecies of Nostradamus, Edgar Cayce, and the like... it is somewhat higher than coincidental those two men and the Mayan calendar all put the world falling apart around the same time. I suppose I buy into it enough to be vaguely concerned and to begin to think about things like paring down on my possessions, living a more sustainable lifestyle, and wanting to build or buy a green home of some kind in a relatively safe area.

Be it driven by external concerns or an internal call to a more peaceful and simple life, Andy and I both have noticed a pull and shift toward a new type of living. I see it as a blend of spiritual needs and practical considerations... something seeking to balance the ascetic qualities of monasticism, the theories of detachment so prevalent in Buddhist philosophy, the social action and humanist commitment of Unitarian Universalism, and the social interest of Adler.

It all seems to coalesce and make sense on some days. I would love to know where the end is, which I think is one of the greatest lessons I've yet to learn: process before content, means rather than end, the journey above the destination.

And so, it is not so important to know where I will end up as it is to know how I want to get there. To ensure authenticity and compassion en route. To follow dreams and strive toward improvement and seek out positive change in the best way I know how.

Some days, the fear and sadness feels a bit more prevelant, but most of the time I simply wish I could do more to help those affected by these many disasters... and I pray the whisperings of darkness to come are simply the anxious worries of mistaken sayers seeking to make sense of the complexity and confusion that may inevitably arise as we move through life.

Ode to Bach

Unfortunately, it's too late in the day to tackle a literal ode; however, you may consider this a metaphorical one and (hopefully) forgive my tiredness and lack of creative spark as bedtime quickly approaches.

Bach seems to me inherently and unarguably connected to the divine. His music is transportational... transcendent. I don't know what he was channeling or how... but, for me, it's like the chords of my soul are struck by the complexity and beauty of his music to create a harmonious vibrational frequency so that I may resonate with every single molecule and atom around me and ultimately feel one with everything.

Which is one way in which I understand God.

Another way is through connection to others. Adler would call it social interest. A Buddhist might think of it as compassion. I see it as a kind of commitment to strive toward seeing (feeling, knowing) the intrinsic worth of my fellow human beings in order to provide (and ask for) help with openness and kindness and without fear or judgment.

My take is: Social interest and compassion are linked to purposefulness and meaning, which are linked to centeredness and peace, which are connected to enlightenment and the divine, which links back to social interest and compassion... and on and on. One might even say they are interconnected, because - let's face it - linearity in this world is rare and truth tends to be woven into a more holistic and systemic pattern when you look at it from far enough away.

Bach is my ticket to a bird's eye view from which, for a few precious moments, I can see the intricate webbing of my singular life and begin to appreciate the multiple connections binding me to an infinite and interconnected world.