My lovely husband helped point out tonight that I am on the cusp of achieving all I set out to accomplish and had identified as what would make me happy.
And I realized, in one of those quiet kind of ah ha moments that the only thing standing in the way of my happiness is myself... and my attachments and ego, which tends to make things kind of cloudy and uncomfortable.
So silly. I am capable of being so very silly sometimes.
I think this is something I would like to change—this inability to embrace my happiness and to find peace with and accept where I am. What is. Who I am. Who I wish to be.
Loving ourselves can be so tricky sometimes, and yet it seems to be at the very heart of what helps us move forward, evolve, and let go of our cloudiness so we can help others and be truly present in our lives and the lives we encounter around us.
Not that I'm there yet, mind you. But things got a lot clearer tonight... and hopefully it will stick!
Monday, December 1, 2008
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2 comments:
Something that would be of great help is to take the 30 day blessings challenge at bettertobless.com. It's very fruitful
We know each other well enough that I know that *you* will understand when I say that *I* understand. :)
Always in my own way. Always.
I think part of the trick is not to berate yourself/ourselves for being in the way. Just try to acknowledge it, in a gentle way: "Yes, I do that." (just the way you did in your blog post, really.) And then just keep that in mind for next time...
So you're on the right track.
And I'm proud of you. You really have accomplished so much, even if the path took you places you didn't think it would/didn't quite want to go.
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