Balance, faith, and impossible possibilities

I started the day with multiple announcements via NPR of deaths in Iraq, Israel, and a realtor who was raped showing a house to a man pretending to be an interested buyer. Sometimes I feel so concerned about the world Ari will eventually be entering as an independent and separate little person. It's hard to imagine the time at which it will feel safe orI will feel ready to let her go and trust she will be okay. (Makes me much more empathetic to my mother's worries, questions, and attention to my own life!)

Andy and I are very focused right now on finding a balanced path that unites all three of our lives and individual journeys in a way that will be productive and happy for all of us. Not an easy task, especially when one of the three cannot yet articulate her concerns, needs, interests, or goals! But we attempt it nonetheless and seek to find the middle way (a Bhuddist concept very central to my husband's and often my approach to life). This had led to much career confusion for both of us, along with some painful bouts of indecision and stagnancy.

But... I feel we are on the right path, and I have faith in not only our ability to accomplish this goal we've set for ourselves, but also a delight in and commitment to the effort itself. I am grateful I have a partner for whom such an active, mindful search is important and present.

It connects back to our own path toward one another and process by which we eventually got married and began a life together. We held out for something we had faith existed... not perfection, not an ideal, not the one and only - rather, we refused to settle... we held out for something striving toward constant improvement that simultaneously embraced challenge and sought balance between everything and nothing.

I think we both find it helpful to apply the allegory of our relationship to the travails of our larger, more occupation- and finance-focused adult lives. Don't settle... be realistic while setting high standards... look for the healthy balance, the acceptable compromise, the middle way... be willing to work for it - really really really hard... and above all, have faith. It's important to believe such things are possible and worthwile.